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Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Just Ask Joyce — Am I Winning?

Q: “How, as a new mother, can I stay away from competitive mothering? It seems like everything is a competition these days with parenting, and you can feel pressure from others for not doing things a certain way.”

Joyce:  Pressure from parents can make a child’s life pretty miserable, as well as their own. Setting expectations is nothing to scoff at, but a parent needs to keep in mind the negative impact premature competition could have on a child. 

Constantly pushing an agenda on a child to achieve and perform, to develop at an accelerated rate, or to excel in arenas they haven’t yet grown into or aren’t naturally gifted in can adversely affect the child. This kind of competition in parenting can manifest itself into issues such as nightmares, acting out, choosing underachieving friends, and even bullying later on. 

Balance in a child’s life will make a more pleasurable home life for everyone. Don’t be intimidated into keeping up with other moms’ schedules or plans for their children. It’s not a race to have our kids grow up. There are enough demands in parenting without putting more pressure on this important role. 

Need family advice? Change your life … NOW! Write Joyce Oglesby, Family-Life Fix-It Pro, at I’m here to help! Check out my books and other resources at Listen to my live talk show Monday through Friday on WFIA 94.7fm/900am at 3pm.


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